Half a decade of mouth-honour and empty threats and finally it happened. Dinner in LA. The Bell End spirit, stuffed into a couple of pieces of hand luggage, is rebirthed with a dozen bottles of Etna red at Gjelina in Venice. Is this the first leg of the American Tour? Where next? San Francisco? Boston? Duluth? I feel like Mitt Romney. There is a throbbing, robin’s egg-sized area behind my right eye which refuses to recover. Maybe we should be asking the delightful Jigisha Bouverat, Rachel Crain, Lisa Matthews, Karen Youngs, Jen Lamping, Krissy Hicks, Cindy Rowe, Rob Howard, Alex Tehrani, Lisa Howard and Selwyn Lovely whether persisting with such a concept is advisable. But it’s becoming evident that Bell End dinners, wherever they may be, come with a corollary of pain and corruption.