Who is a Bellender?
The question has vexed tens of small minds over the last five months. Well, now we intend to find out. Guess no longer. You are a Bellender. So is the woman sitting next to you. Your husband? He’s a total Bellender. Everybody says so.
And so, this coming Thursday, as if your faculties weren’t already horrible-besieged by the torrid combination of Rye, Vermouth, Absinthe, Rosé, Campari, Prosecco, Art, Selwyn’s Hair, Andouille, Chicken, Neil’s Jacket, Shrimp, Sculpture, Piano …
… prepare yourself for the full girth of The Vitti Proboscis. Because, under the shelter of Neil Powell’s artistic umbrella – and with the support of the Old Overholt Foundation – 3/29/12 will mark the inauguration of the Bell End Genome Project.
If you’re here on Thursday, Guido Vitti – a complete and utter Bellender in his own right – will be ensconced aloft in the master bedroom, rendering all attendees in his own inimitable style. Please, when he plucks you from the seething masses, succumb to his will. Honestly, it’s for mankind’s betterment, not to mention your own.